The fact that happiness has so many meanings gets overlooked much of the time, I think, because when people recommend techniques for finding happiness, they have a very specific form of it in mind. Acknowledging all the other types would just muddy the waters.

On top of that, in our society some forms of happiness are just considered better than others. There are plenty of books out there on gratitude and equanimity, but there's no one around with a plan for getting the most out of your schadenfreude.

So instead of trying to fit myself into someone else's picture of "happiness," I decided to figure out what kinds of happiness I excelled at and which ones I enjoyed the most. That way, I figured, I could better appreciate the happinesses – even when they were mixed with negative emotions – that I already had.

How are you happy?

Here is my list. English-speakers tend not to have very sophisticated vocabularies The definitions and groupings are my own, in consultation with the internet. If I've left any out, or radically misrepresented any of them, let me know. Here's what people might mean when they say they're feeling "happy."

Some forms of happiness arise from reflecting on your current situation:

• Solace – the relief that comes when others help you through times of trouble.
• Gratification – a short-term positive feeling that occurs when something has improved: a sense that something wrong has been put aright, or that a desire has been fulfilled.
• Security – a sense that one is protected, at least for a little while, from things that cause negative feelings.
• Care-freeness – a sense that one doesn't have any worries or responsibilities, at least for a little while.
• Comfort – similar to security, "comfort" is a broad term that refers to the awareness that one feels good.
• Optimism – this one is directed toward the future. It's the feeling that things will get better, or stay good.
• Hope – a feeling of optimism that depends less on confidence.
• Gladness – a feeling that often accompanies confidence; a sort of optimism about the present.

 

Some forms of happiness are specifically outwardly directed.

• Cheer – a pleasant, easy-going good-naturedness.
• Joviality – a hearty, confident, assertive good cheer, the sort of feeling that Jove (also known as Jupiter) might feel.
• Good will – an earnest desire to help other people, or at least to get along with them.
• Benevolence – an extremely important emotion during the Enlightenment, but rarely talked about today. It is the good feeling that comes from helping others, which happens after people act on their good will.
• Affection – the warmth that comes from thinking about, or being with, a particular person, animal, place, or thing.
• Loving-kindness – as described by the Buddha, a desire for the general good of all people and animals, and probably plants and non-living things as well. This is similar to affection, but lacks affection's element of desire.
• Schadenfreude – more-or-less the inverse of benevolence: the pleasure that comes from seeing other people fairing badly.

 

And some forms of happiness are transient, and can be very intense:

• Titillation – a form of momentary arousal in reaction to a specific situation, often something considered salacious or inappropriate.
• Pique – the pleasure that comes from experiencing other emotions, like anger, self-righteousness, and curiosity. Horror movies and political commentators often cause it. It is different from titillation in that titillation is a response something outside of yourself, while pique is a response to an emotional state. (Yes, it is a feeling about feelings.)
• Arousal – a heightened state of positive excitement.

 

Some forms of happiness absorb you completely:

• Bliss – a state of simple, unselfconscious positive feeling and relaxation.
• Flow – the state of being completely caught up in what you're doing – being "in the zone."
• Rapture - the state of being completely caught up in an experience like listening to music (rather than an activity, as in flow).
• Reverie – a blissful state associated with sweet dreams and fantasies.
• Oceanic feeling – This is an unusual one, associated most frequently with intense religious experiences, meditation, and the use of certain drugs. It's the feeling – usually fleeting – of being one with everything. (The name comes from a comment Sigmund Freud made at the beginning of his book, The Future of an Illusion.)

 

They can vary in duration and intensity. Milder forms tend to last longer than more intense ones.

• Joy – a broad term that covers several more specific kinds of happiness, it usually refers to a feeling that arises when someone feels confidently comfortable in their surroundings. Delight, pleasure, and elation all fit under this umbrella.
• Delight – a short-lived form of joy that appears in response to a specific situation, like the sudden, unexpected appearance of your best friend, a birthday cake, or the paying of a cat video.
• Enjoyment – longer lasting and a little less intense that delight. (The meal was very enjoyable, but the broccolini was a bit dry.)
• Pleasure – sometimes a synonym for joy, at other times it's a milder, less

 

Some forms of happiness tend to be energizing:

• Glee – a good-humored arousal
• Exhilaration – a feeling of energetic, optimistic excitement
• Elation – a sense of gladness or lightness
• Ebullience – a bouncier, more humorous kind of elation
• Ecstasy – if bliss is a relaxed sort of ecstasy, then ecstasy is an unselfconscious type of excited, engaged bliss.
• Empathic contagion – the positive feelings that arise as a result of being around people who feel good. This is a main source of pleasure for many people, but often overlooked by writers who comment on happiness.
• Relief – the sudden end of a stressor, either emotional or physical. The feeling you get after not drawing the short straw, or a good poop, or upon discovering that the elastic on your underpants had been turned it, and straightening it.
• Succor – the feeling of relief that occurs when a need is satisfied.

 

Then there are some cool, calming ones:

• Equanimity – the sense that there's nothing to get worked up about, and that it's a good thing.
• Serenity/peace – A cool, calm, positive sense that arises when one's negative emotions are playing at a low volume.
• Collectedness – a sense that, in the short term at least, everything is under control and working out.

 

Some types of happiness – those more popular with life coaches, for example – arise in response to long-lasting life circumstances.

• Contentedness – the feeling that, when you take a step back and look at your life, you have pretty much what you want.
• Acceptance of one's realities – a sense of peace derived from the recognition that, although life may not be perfect, it is something you can live with.
• Well-being –this is a sense that one's inner life is in order. This is similar to contentedness, although I think of contentedness as relating to both an inner life and an outer life.
• Felicity – a form of good cheer that reflects a deep inner happiness
• Nostalgia – a warm, affectionate feeling of longing for a moment in the past
• Satiation – a short blast of contentedness, the feeling that arises when you realize you've just had enough of something you like, like a good meal, a good movie, or a good laugh.
• Satisfaction – the feeling that something has been done right
• Gratitude – a glad thanks that someone or something is the way it is.

 

To feel some forms of happiness, you have to step back as far as you can and look at life – your circumstances, your world, the meaning of your existence as a human being.

• Appreciation – similar to gratitude, appreciation is the feeling that arises when you find something good or valuable in a situation or thing.
• Belonging – a comfort derived from relationships, either with other people, or an institution, or with the natural world. A feeling of security in one's family or society.
• Vitality – an intense sense of energetic aliveness
• Fulfillment – a broad, general satisfaction with what one has done with one's life.
• Completeness – The specific feeling of comfort that comes with that recognition that all the important desires in your life have been fulfilled.
• Self-actualization – a step beyond fulfillment, self-actualization involves an identity: it is the sense that someone has become who they want to be.
• Fullness of feeling – a sort of appreciation for the opportunity to be human, to experience the good and face up to the bad; the sense that life, in all its vicissitudes, is very much worth living.

 

(And if you guessed that there were more than fifty terms in this list, you were right.)

Where Are We Now?

Like everything else in society, there are fashions in feelings. Pique is popular these days, although there's no lack of criticism aimed at the people who provide the opportunities to be piqued. There is no consensus on the best types of happiness to pursue; the Buddha recommended the cool, calm ones like equanimity and loving-kindness, while these days, many psychologists are recommending gratitude, an emotion a bit too warm for the Buddha, at least according to some schools of thought.

Like most people, I'm drawn toward the intense, transient feelings like pique – the Sour Patch Kids of emotion – because they pack a quick punch, even if they aren't especially good for me in the long run.

Although they often fly under the radar in conversations about happiness, the ones I think are most worth pursuing belong in the last group, those that give meaning to life. They are often overlooked for two reasons. First, they involve some amount of discomfort, and given the way English is structured, it's hard to promote an idea that fits in the category of "happiness" that's noticeably unhappy. These types of happiness also involve meaning, and meaning only comes about through connection to something outside the self. Our current cultural approach to happiness – focusing on individual psychology more than anything else, and adapting to unwanted realities – complicates that search for meaning, as it involves things much larger than the individual.

In spite of this, they are important both as goals and as measures of an existence because they help us think about how to live full, vital, meaningful lives.

But of course, that doesn't mean that the other forms aren't worth pursuing as well. So what kinds of happy are you? Which are you good at, and what kinds would you like to pursue? Leave a comment below.